Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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