I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You were trust falling into bushes
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
