i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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