i permit you to call me
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
