If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
