Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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