So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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