and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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