She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize