Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
