Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
