every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
