I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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