Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
