I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
He's on the porch naked. Help.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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