the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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