Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
