I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
