So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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