big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
