The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
