absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
