Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Randomize
