I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
