Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
