Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
As shirtless as possible
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
