No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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