Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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