Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
