Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
