Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
