Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
where am i from again
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize
