It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
