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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You have to summon your inner elephant
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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