Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
no more duck duck goose at the bar
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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