Can i not drive my cunt home
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
