Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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