if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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