i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
