what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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