There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
