Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
What a dumb baby whore.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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