I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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