Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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