where does the pee come out of this thing
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It's official drugs can't kill me
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
