Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
