Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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