We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
