can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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