eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
