It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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